and it's been eighteen days, since..
i don't know any more. and it's really only been fourteen days, but bare with me.


i miss how we used to curl up together,
smiling and whispering iloveyous.
i've always been a negative girl,
but you were the only one i've ever believed.
now that i look both ways, i guess i enjoy the pain.
i'm getting an idea of what my future has in store,
and it doesn't look so bad so far. i just can't wait to be
eighteen. no hiding behind parents that can buy us cigarettes,
less lies to everyone- yourself included. no mask to hide behind;
your only enemy lies within, if it's even there anymore.

-



two years may seem like a long time, but i almost think it's coming too soon.
i have plans i'm not entirely sure i'll be able to keep up with-
everything is changing, and i'm definitely behind. my friends
are no longer friends, and i'm leaving the rest behind soon.
i've always wished that i could just.. grow up, and now that i have,
i'm not sure whether i'm glad, scared, or both.
but i don't think i'd reverse it for the world.